Fly on a wall

There are plenty of instances where I've wanted to be a fly on a wall. Well, last night I was. Last night was the faculty Chanukah Party at my school. At these exclusively social events, I find myself floudering to make converstaion or even at the least be included in one. I can make small chit-chat on Sunday mornings in the teachers' room like the rest of 'em, but telling long, involved, amusing stories-- thats not in my reportoire just yet. So I took a look around the circle of chairs, hoping to identify someone safe enough to sit next to. Nope. I spot Avi, the maintenance guy, sitting down. Nice guy, he's probably about 65. I'm thinking, this can't be that bad... I mean it's Avi... I've asked him for hammer and nails, I've asked him to fix the toilet, we've interacted before...thats at least more than I can say for some of the other people in the room. So I take a seat next to him. I say hi and sit quietly, not putting any pressure on myself to make converstion. Awkward silences don't have to be awkward I decided. After a few minutes he asks me, "You live in Modiin?" to which I say "Yes." Then I say , "You?" and he says "Yes." Silence. Then I say "Do you want a drink?" And he says, "Thats ok, I'll go get one myself." And that was the end of our conversation... I told you I was bad at this!
For this party everyone was asked to bring an item of food to contribute to the shmorgasboard. I decided to bring chocolate crinkle cookies (KP II). I could have chosen something much easier- plastic ware, drinks... but no-- because I'm on a misson. As an olah chadashah I'm on a mission to teach Israelis that there is life beyond rugelach. Its been an uphill battle, but I think I'm making headway. Last month I introduced my co-workers to Kosher Palate chocolate chip sticks. They were wowed. I consider last night a success because I got some requests for my recipe!! Mark my words, there will come a day when Israel will understand that bakeries can be home to dozens of kinds of pastries, not just one-- and you will have me to thank.
Anyway, the night turned out to be fun, as a fly that is. I took in a lot. I listened to conversations, I laughed at jokes, I tasted the food that everyone raved about. I am convinced that my co-workers think I'm such a dead-head because I never say anything even remotely funny, I never fight passionately about anything. I just listen mostly... and nod sometimes. When I look back at last night I feel as though I had a good time, even though it was in a passive way. I am able to admit that I gained by being there even though I didn't contribute much at all. Though in my eyes the chocolate crinkle cookies was enough of a contribution.